Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Still Learning...

My brain has been too full of mediation stuff to blog. I’ve been through 16+ hours so I’m a third of the way done. Our next class is tomorrow night and I’m only about half done with the homework. My Child Support Worksheet is done, my mediator responses half done, but I haven’t even given thought to the Parenting Plan. I’ll whip it all together tomorrow.

I really do like the law part of this. I found the formula used to figure out child support to be very interesting. There are lots of things taken into consideration that I didn’t know about, like health insurance, day care costs, etc. I’ve also learned a few things about laws in this state that confirmed my earlier belief that Persons X and Z are full of shit. Things they have told me about the process didn’t make sense when they told me. Now I know the law doesn’t back up their story either. Yes, as a matter of fact I do consider myself an expert now after 16 hours of training (sarcasm font needed here).

What I am still not crazy about is the touchy-feely responses that I’m supposed to give to people. Also, I can never “suggest” a solution, even if there’s a common sense one that is painfully obvious. That’s especially annoying because I always know better and I love telling people what to do. I do hope that I can figure out a way to incorporate my more blunt style into this. I can’t imagine asking people day after day, “How does that make you feel?”

A benefit that I hadn’t really taken into consideration before starting this training was how this training might impact my professional life. Perhaps I will learn to give more thought and be more sensitive to people before responding to their request, demand or whine. I would like to take the mediation part of the training and perhaps incorporate it into a Human Resources type of job.

I worked in HR for a while before coming here and doing “nothing marketable” for eight years. I truly did enjoy HR at the first company I was at. I enjoyed it so much that I started going to school for and HR Certification program… but then I got a B+ from some assish professor and there went that. My second job with an HR focus was at a car dealership. HR and car dealerships are polar opposites and should be kept from one another. You know that greasy, crappy feeling you get when you go in to buy a car? Well, the owners make the employees feel that way too. The only HR-ing they wanted me to do there was send out COBRA information timely so they would be in compliance with the law. Anyway, I think it would be interesting to bring mediation more into the business world and perhaps work with employees in conflict. Given all the staffing cuts, I’m sure there are loads of companies out there looking for someone like that (again, where is that damn sarcasm font?!).

This training may be helpful in my personal life too. Maybe I’ll be able to start interacting with EN, Sugar and Spice in a nicer fashion. So instead of our conversations going like this:

Spice: Mama, I think you like Sugar better than me.
Me: No. I really don’t like either one of you.

It could go like this:

Spice: Mama, I think you like Sugar better than me.
Me: How does that make you feel?

Um, seriously… no. If I said that to Spice I could potentially be in danger of her wrath. On the other hand, my first response was met with uproarious laughter, the laugh-til-you-cry type, actually.

That’s the choice I make as a mother. I’d rather just diffuse the whinefest with a comment that really is fucking hilarious. 

xoxo
Ice Princess

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