First School Night

Summer vacation officially ends tonight with the girls going to bed on a “school night” schedule. The summer flew by and I look back and think, “We did nothing.” We didn’t take any trips or go anyplace new. Instead, we hung out by the pool, played with friends and let the girls spend lots of time with their grandmothers. A part of me feels guilty, summer vacation should include a grand trip somewhere. Then I remember our fun trip to Myrtle Beach in April and the new house we are moving to and my guilt is lessened.

We have bought new clothes, shoes, backpacks and lunch boxes. The back packs are filled with a few supplies (no supply list yet!) and the endless forms I filled out. How come I can’t just copy one set of forms and turn in for both? I grocery shopped today and bought piles of snacks, a nice mix of the school-approved healthy snacks and the kid-approved sweets. They will have a difficult time deciding what they want to bring tomorrow.

We went yesterday for fresh haircuts and spent tonight getting beautiful for tomorrow: a bath with bubbles and manicures and pedicures for both. They headed off to bed on schedule and settled in after reading a bit. I’m not so sure either one is sleeping, the excitement was palatable.

It is a year of big changes… Sugar in middle school and Spice in kindergarten. For the first time ever, Sugar will get report cards with real grades, no more “At Grade Level” marks with comments about how good and sweet she is. I worry about how she will do. I know she has to work hard and doesn’t like to. She’ll only push herself if she’s got a mama behind her forcing her to do her best. I don’t know if either of us is up for it. I nagged all summer for her to take part in the challenge to read ten books. Only a few days ago, after hearing about a field trip for the kids that participated, has she decided to start reading. I guess that’s how it will have to be with her… rewards for effort put forth.

Spice walks into a new place tomorrow after leaving the daycare where she started when she was six months old. She’s never been the new girl, she’s never worked to fit in. Instead, she was with a group of kids that she’d been with since they were babies. I wonder if she will miss them and I wonder if she will try to fit in. She’s marched to her own beat for her whole life, part of me hopes she keeps her individuality, but certainly not to the point where she has trouble making friends. If all else fails, the kid that dropped trou and peed on her at daycare will be in her kindergarten class.  I still haven’t told her and I am not afraid to admit that I’m scared of her reaction.

I’m anxious and excited to see how tomorrow goes. I hope they will love their teachers and find some old friends and make some new ones. I say a silent prayer that they look back on this school year and proclaim it to be the “Best Year Ever.” Then again, that’s my hope every single school year.

xoxo

Ice Princess 

Kindergarten Open House

On Friday we attended the Open House for Spice’s upcoming school year. She will be attending kindergarten in our town’s newest school. It is fairly small and houses only morning and afternoon preschool and kindergarten classes.

She was up bright and early asking if it was time to go yet. Unfortunately, the event wasn’t scheduled until 1:00 pm, so we decided to run a few errands in the morning to fill time… mostly so she wouldn’t drive us too crazy.

Finally it was time to go and she could barely contain herself. We got to the school and found Spice to be over-dressed in her pink dress and silver lame´ (really) sandals. Most of the other kids were in t-shirts and shorts. She couldn’t get from the parking lot to the school fast enough and pulled me along. As we got inside, some foreign being took over the body of my child. Gone is the sassy girl I know and I had Shy Spice at my side.

She flushed a bright red when she was greeted by a woman she knows. She couldn’t even bring herself to say thank you when she was complimented on her spectacular outfit. She hid behind me and I nearly dragged her to her classroom. We were given a scavenger hunt to work on, a great way for her to become acquainted with her classroom, cubby and coat hook. She met her teacher and the various aids that work in that room. She could barely answer their questions and I found myself biting my tongue to not answer on her behalf. Sugar was glad to pipe up whenever she could.

We left the classroom with a sticker and forms to fill out. Because I knew footwear was a bone of contention with her, I was happy to see the principal at the entrance. We went over and introduced ourselves (I have a feeling I’ll be on a first name basis with the principal by the end of the school year). I asked if there were rules about shoes and the principal addressed Spice when she said “No flip flops.” Shy Spice became Scowly Spice. I thought she was going to argue her case but she did not. The principal told her she’d have much more fun on the playground in safer shoes. With that, she said we should go check it out, and we were off.

We stopped at the waiting school bus so Spice could practice getting in and out and hit the playground. I wasn’t really surprised to see Spice play by herself and not interact with any other kids. I am her mother, and I didn’t talk to any of the parents. Of course Sugar found a kid she knew and was less than impressed when we called her to leave.

I sorted through all of the forms she needs for Tuesday and read through the Parent Handbook. I had to sign a form saying I read it, so of course I read the entire booklet. I came across a section titled “Birthday Celebrations” and let Spice know that on her birthday, she would not be able to bring cupcakes to school to share with her classmates due to food allergies. This is a girl who takes cupcakes seriously and she was not happy. I told her that they suggested she bring something else to share with her class, like pencils. She frowned at me and said, “But you can’t eat a pencil.”

It’s gonna be a long year.

xoxo

Ice Princess 

Middle School Open House

Yesterday was the Open House for Sugar’s new school. She enters fifth grade next week and therefore moves on to the middle school. They seem a little young to be moving in with the ‘big kids,’ but they are kept in an area of the school that is completely separate from the rest of the kids. I know my baby will be ok.

Sugar spent the night before at BFFL’s house, so I arranged with her mother to meet right at the school. I talked to Sugar during the evening to remind her that I would be there and to ask if everything was going well at her friend’s house. She told me that she had brought “Soul Surfer” with her so they could watch it together. I said, “BFFL didn’t want to see that movie! Why would you bring it?” I truly hope that she brought the movie to share with her friends because she loves it so much, not because she could force it on her friend after her refusal to come to the movies with us. As it turns out, BFFL, her two sisters and mother all watched the movie and thoroughly enjoyed it.

Spice and I got to the middle school on time and were greeted by Sugar and her friends. They seemed to be getting along quite well. We located her two classrooms and found the teachers to be overwhelmed with other parents, so BFFL’s older sister took us on a tour of the entire school. Sugar seems very excited and thrilled to start school next week.

As she wandered off to reacquaint herself with the friends she hadn’t seen all summer, I was left to deal with the Mommy Mafia and the drama that they bring to the table. Oddly, this time with the mafia didn’t go as it normally did. I didn’t feel excluded or talked down to. For once, I felt like I was part of the mafia myself. We laughed and joked. I told them about the new house and not knowing who Spice’s kindergarten teacher is. They insisted that the information was in the packet I received and *ahem* must not have read. But this time, rather than feeling that they were talking down to me, really being the only full-time working mama in that bunch (and therefore neglecting my kids), I felt as they were sympathizing with this HOLY SHIT LIFE IS CRAZY time.

Maybe my comfort level is higher because Skinny Bitch and I finally have kids in the same school, so we can face the beasts together. Having a sidekick helps. Her daughter went to the other elementary school in town, which both feed into one middle school. Our girls are friends, so I’m hopeful that they will become closer. It seemed like all the kids (and mamas) were from our school, but Skinny Bitch knows many from her girls’ involvement in softball. She got to see the mafia in action when one tried to act like she had never met her before. Skinny Bitch with Brass says, “Oh yes, we’ve met. Our kids played softball together.” Score one for SB, I would have stood there and pretended that I’d never seen her before either.

I wandered back down to the classrooms and got to meet both teachers. I have to say, I love them both. One said, “Oh, I’m so glad you came back… I was eyeballing your purse and wanted to tell you I liked it.” We took a few minutes out of our purse talk to discuss school, but we circled right back to talk about outlets and coupons. I really dig this chick. BFFL’s mom was off to the side, rolling her eyes, “I knew you two would hit it off.”

We had concerns when everyone got their letters assigning classrooms and Sugar didn’t seem to know anyone in her class. She was relieved to see quite a few people yesterday that will be with her. One girl she doesn’t care for at all… she tried to befriend her when this girl was new to town which went well for a short time. Then Sugar invited her to a birthday party and the new girl said she’d only come if she could bring her own friends. Since then, they haven’t spoken much… However, Sugar’s FIRST CRUSH from kindergarten is with her this year. She got all flustered when she saw him come into the classroom. His mother and I just looked at each other and raised our eyebrows. We apparently both remember that he called her Peanut in kindergarten. We both remember that during kindergarten graduation, Sugar looked right at me and said, “Mama, just look at his smile.” I’m grateful that she said it loud enough that we caught it with the video camera. It will be interesting to see if the crush remains or if her taste has changed.

We wandered out to BFFL’s car to collect Sugar’s things and I was pleased to see the daughters in this perfect family having a skirmish. BFLL starts hollering that she had called shotgun, but her older sister sat in the front anyway. As she closed the door to the back seat, her mother said, “Abby’s in the front because she’s my favorite. Bye BFFL!” She slammed the door and looked at me, “You know I’m going to pay dearly for that later.” I replied, “Yeah you will, but it was hilarious.” I truly appreciate and was happy to see another mother navigating though the battlefield armed with nothing more than a sense of humor. Mean mothers unite!

Crazy  times ahead. A new school for Sugar and a new routine. I was thrilled to see her interact with so many kids yesterday, she’s sure to find her spot in the place she will go for the next four years. It was interesting to see how tall all her friends got over the summer. I’m sure Sugar grew too, but she’s still so little compared to her friends. If Smiley Boy still wants to call his kindergarten girlfriend by her old nickname, Peanut still fits. 

xoxo

Ice Princess

Fuzzhead

My thoughts are muddled and have been for the last week. That should explain the lack of blogging. I just can’t see straight. For a variety of reasons, my thoughts are overwhelmed and all jumbled up and nothing comes out that sounds right.

Last weekend we had a few friends over and some of us over-indulged. Others were smart enough to beat feet out of my house at a reasonable hour. Those that stayed kept their wits about them until we insured that those driving seemed ok, and that the remaining children were bedded down for the night. We then adjusted our virtual party hats to a jauntier angle and delicately sipped our adult beverages at a leisurely pace. Ok, that’s a flat-out lie. We slammed beer like we were teenagers sneaking beers at a kegger. We drank like that day was the last we would live. If we had been lucid enough to find a funnel I’m sure we would have put that to good use.

It was another night when everyone present had their game on. Much fun was had and we all stayed up way past our bedtimes. The sleepover guests slunk out the door around 8 am to do the walk of shame down my driveway. Unfortunately, that meant that Spice was in my face screaming that her friend had left without saying goodbye.

Happily, my belly and my head, while not clear, did not ache. I was impressed with how good I felt until I stood up. Oh my dear God… I am 40 years old, how did I think that STANDING for nine straight hours was a good idea? Let me clarify that: I stood, in the kitchen on tile floors, wearing flip flops for most of that. Then around 11, Ultra and I headed out to the garage to hang out with the boys. I do recall mentioning, and her agreeing that we sit down. I don’t know why we never did, but my body hurt all day Sunday. Even my toes weren’t happy to have been separated for so long. I’ll admit to smirking a bit when my pal texted to see if I ached too… oh yeah… She might be younger and littler, but she’s old too! HA!

We also needed to get moving on school clothes shopping so we hit Old Navy on Sunday afternoon. We bought a few things, but I need to go online today to get more stuff… Online 30% off sale ends today, for those of you not in the know! After that, I think all we have left are supplies, backpacks and shoes. Of course Spice is dying for the Bella Ballerina shoes from Sketchers… because she totally needs a pair of shoes that will help her twirl better. Seriously. I’m hoping to redirect her attention towards the Twinkletoes. I think they’re adorable and if I can’t have them, one of my kids should.  

And then there’s the home buying/selling drama. We had our inspection Saturday which went pretty well. The girls and I stopped by quickly and I nearly died when I saw the house in the bright noontime sunlight. I love a sun-drenched house, hate putting lights on during the day. However, sunlight pouring through all those windows magnified the filth in that house. Nothing is clean. There is a layer of dirt, grime and scum on everything. It truly is gross.

Throughout the week, we have had different issues to discuss, forms to sign, documents to locate and scan…. Meantime we still have our house to sort through and list. I have tomorrow and Friday off to get this done. The girls will be away for part of that time, so I’ll be able to get through their rooms without their assistance and tantrums. If they miss anything, I can totally lie and say it’s packed to go to the new place. By the time we get there, they’ll have forgotten.

If I were to be totally honest, I would admit to the activity that has really been the one keeping me from blogging… It’s a stupid online game that I have become ridiculously hooked on… it’s a Scrabble game that you can play with your Facebook friends. And the kicker? I hate real Scrabble, but now I find myself even dreaming of those stupid letters. I’m such a junkie that last week when I threw down the word “dildo” in a game with EN’s Friday night goalie, I texted the rest of my gaming buddies so they too could be impressed with my dirty girl talk.

I have all these balls in the air, a crazy juggling act. Obviously, the juggling act is made crazier with my fuzzy head, filled with too many plans to make and things to do. I silently thank the Sweet Baby Jesus for helping me see the light on Saturday, knowing that my fuzzy head is as a result of stuff and not alcohol, because I still am never drinking again. 

xoxo

Ice Princess

Nunya

I had an inkling that it wasn’t a good idea to invite the mothers to come see the new house last Friday. However, this is the year of the kinder, gentler Ice Princess and I was in the mood to be nice so I invited them. Reality gave me a dummy smack and I wondered, “WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING?” before we even got to the new house.

I left work early to meet EN at home for lunch before meeting the realtor at the house. EN’s mother showed up nearly an hour early and she came to our house rather than meeting at the new place. Both those moves seemed odd to me, like she was trying to talk to EN when I wasn’t around. If that was her plan, then my presence ruined her day.

We arrived at the house long before my mother did, so Bug got a private tour. My sense of unease grew as I saw the house through her eyes. I felt like every place she looked, she pictured space for herself. She about tripped over herself trying to get to the stairs quickly when EN went into the basement. I didn’t go down with them, but EN later said that he had a similar feeling to mine. She's got a lot of stuff, and that big ol' basement gives her lots of room to spread out!

Throughout the tour she mentioned money and projects repeatedly, “This house is going to take a lot of money! This house will need a lot of work!” Ok, we heard you the first seven times, so stop. We understand the work it will take and the money involved. WE GET IT! This is the third house EN and I have bought together and we aren’t clueless. We dream big, but we are patient and will tackle one job at a time when money and time permit. EN is a great laborer and I’m a fantastic supervisor! Let’s call a spade a spade, I’m not at all mechanically inclined and even watching me paint a wall gives EN a tension headache.

Bug called us on Saturday and talked more about the house and asked more financial questions. She called again today and asked many of the same questions. It’s like she is hinting that the house is too much for us, both financially and work-wise and wouldn’t things be so much easier with her living there and paying rent? She was even bold enough to ask, “What will you do with that room above the garage? You know, that little Spice is so funny. When we were up there she said, ‘Grandma, this could be your room.’” Oh, I’m sorry, hit me with a 2x4, WE CAN’T HEAR YOUR IMPLICATION.

So now I’m miffed. I resent someone prying into my financial business. I resent someone implying that we don’t know what we are doing. This bothers me coming from her especially… she is a financial disaster. Because I don’t like to discuss my financial business, I won’t discuss hers here either, but I will say that she’s had many issues. She’d be one of the last people I would ask for financial advice. If friends want to talk to me about their business, even asking for advice at times, I’ll listen and help the best I can. Making sound financial decisions is something I am good at. I’m proud of my credit rating and lack of credit card debt. I have worked my ass off to get us in that position.

EN texted me about his mom and how he answered her questions. When she asked about the amount we owe on our current house, he said he wasn’t sure because he doesn’t pay the bills. When he mentioned the additional space in the house, I texted him back and said, “Tell her we’re buying two little African babies. There’s no room at the inn.”

Then he told me the “cute” conversation Bug shared about Spice. I told him to pass the message to Spice about the African babies, there won’t be room for her either. And to answer the question, “What will we do with the room above the garage?” It’s already equipped with the Boom Chicka Bench. That room is where EN and I will make sex videos to sell online so we can afford our mortgage.

It’s nunya… none of your business. And if she is going to ask questions that pry into my personal business, she is going to get a wise-ass response. 

xoxo

Ice Princess

Potty Talk

I’ll admit that I am a freak about certain things and have funny rules for food, house cleaning and hand washing. Despite what Shannon’s husband thinks, I do not walk around muttering, “Must wash hands” under my breath. Really, I don’t.

There may be piles of junk all over my house, but I keep the bathrooms really clean. There may be dirty laundry on the floor, but the faucet is polished and the sinks and toilets are disinfected regularly. No one will get a case of cooties from my bathroom. If you do, blame Spice. I have no idea what she does in there, but I do make her wash her hands upon exiting.

It is with great disgust that I come to work every day and use the bathroom in our building. Each floor has its own bathroom, so one would think that people would behave appropriately in the bathroom because we all know who’s using it. Not so much in this place. Every day, there are unflushed messes, nests of toilet paper on the floor, water all over the counter tops, graffiti on the stall walls, and the smell… The smell is usually eye watering and more than once I’ve had dry heaves while I attempt to quickly do my own business. Several weeks ago, there was an overwhelming odor of cat urine in the restroom. I’m not sure how that might have happened, who would let a cat come to work with them? I thought perhaps it was my imagination, but I asked three female coworkers and they noticed it too. One said she sniffed her clothes while in the bathroom, concerned that one of her cats peed on what she was wearing.

The building manager recently sent out a memo that all the bathrooms were going to be refurbished, one floor at a time. We might be inconvenienced, we’d have to use restrooms on a different floor when ours was under construction. We were all very excited. In our silly little heads, “remodeled” meant new sinks, toilets, stalls, floors, etc. We dreamed big and hoped for toilets that actually could flush more than one square of toilet paper at a time.

How sad we were when we realized that their idea of remodeling was painting a wall and installing new sinks. Though they have granite countertops, they are still drenched in water so if you lean against the sink when you wash your hands your shirt gets soaked and it looks like your belly button peed. Even worse, the walls are painted green, which clashes with the broken tiles on the floor, new granite and stall doors. Really, who chose this stuff?

We share the floor of this building with a company that seems to employ mostly women, so our bathroom gets a lot of use. Maintenance comes to clean it during the day, but they never bring the power washer they need to rid that place of its filth. Remodeling didn’t make it look any cleaner or smell any better, perhaps they could have saved money and invested in Lysol rather than green paint and granite countertops.

I am intrigued, then, when I go into this shithole (pun intended) and find women hanging out in there. They chat amongst themselves. They apply make-up, brush teeth or pop zits (seriously) at the counter. And yesterday, a lone woman sat in a stall and chatted on her cell phone. Really? You think that’s a good idea? Sitting in this dump, probably while taking one, and talking on your cell? First off, that’s just gross. There’s a line to multi-tasking that should not be crossed…ever. Second, I don’t want to hear your business and super-yuck to you saying “I love you” at the end of your call. Third, where exactly do you put the phone when you wipe? Do I even want to know?

I was so disgusted by the potty-going-cell-phone-talker that I posted something on Facebook about it. Several men on my list commented about “concentrating” while on the throne, multi-tasking while in the bathroom, talking to their *ahem* business… I think about the men that I have seen enter “the office.”  My father, the men I’ve been married to, the men I work with that I watch go out the office door and into the men’s room. At home or at work, I’ve seen guys bring into the bathroom with them: an iPad, cell phone, books, magazines, newspapers. That just ain’t right.

This is the way it should work… Go to the bathroom unarmed-no book, no phone… get in there, do your business and get out. This room is not meant for hanging around, all business in that place. I can’t comprehend why someone would actually want to spend extra time in there.

Meanwhile, as it turns out, Skinny Bitch works for the same company as the gross women who share my floor. She is fortunate that she works from home, so she doesn’t see the impact her coworkers have on public space. I’m encouraging her to offer a training class titled Etiquette in a Workplace Restroom. She hasn’t come through for me yet. 

xoxo

Ice Princess

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

 I had an opportunity to take a few pictures of the new house today and thought I would share them. Upon closer inspection, we realize that this house will need a major cleaning, some necessary work and a whole lot of cosmetic help.

The Good:

Nice trim in dining room. 

Tray ceiling in master bedroom. Love it!

Family room on first floor. I love all the windows. 

More pretty windows in the dining room. Look to the right
and you'll notice the door  has no trim at all.

Have always wanted wood staircase like this.

The Bad:

Weird cabinet in kitchen. Not sure what it used to be. Spice can
fit inside it. That's all that matters. 

The sink in the master bath. I call her "Peg." 

Tub in master bath. Teensy jacuzzi floating in a sea of cheap plastic.

Not sure where this toilet went. 

Teensy little light in the 20 foot cathedral ceiling. I had to zoom in. 

The Ugly:

The mantle is barely tacked to the wall. Notice there is no fireplace. Yeah, that's sheetrock. Sugar and Spice get to draw a fire on it when we move in.

White carpet in this big room with the weird walls. EN thinks
it was supposed to be church-like. I'm leaning in the
opposite direction.

Window seat covered in maroon carpeting one would find in
a whore's bedroom. I call it the Boom Chicka Boom
Boom Bench.